5 Tips for Writing a Thoughtful Sympathy Card

Writing a sympathy card can be tricky. There is often a deep desire to show that you care and express your support and willingness to be present, but it can be hard to know what to say, especially since people respond so differently to difficult life seasons. Do they desire to isolate? Or do they prefer to push through and act like everything is okay? They may want help with tangible needs, or they may not. Unless you know the person well, these differences can make showing up in times of difficulty intimidating or even discourage being present.

We aren't experts, but we do have some helpful things for you to consider if you want to write a thoughtful sympathy card to someone you care about.

Express genuine condolences: Express your sympathy for the recipient's loss or struggle. Use empathetic language to convey your sorrow and support during this difficult time.
Share fond memories: If someone has passed away with whom you have shared fond memories, consider sharing a brief story or anecdote that highlights their positive qualities, a funny story, or the impact they had on your life.
Offer support and comfort: Let the recipient know that you are there for them and willing to offer any support they need. If you know the person well, you can let them know that you plan to stop by with dinner or be a listening ear over coffee. If the recipient is having an especially hard time, show up to help clean, take care of children, or offer to pick up groceries. Various needs can be met, so take time to consider what you can provide and what feels appropriate for your relationship. Even if you don't feel like you have the words to say, a genuine "I'm here for you" can go a long way, and then follow through :)
Avoid clichés or making it about you: While it's good and natural to want to offer words of comfort, try to avoid using clichéd phrases that may come across as insincere. There is also a line between relating to someone and making it about your own feelings or experience. Make sure you are keeping the focus on the recipient. You can express that you understand and empathize with what they are going through and offer to be an empathetic ear if the recipient wants to talk with someone who can relate.
Check back in: Even after the card has been sent, take time to follow up later. Checking back in goes a long way to show that you care and are aware the things may not quickly be getting easier or better.